So, I've been doing a lot of banishing and revelatory work over the past 3-6 months or so....well, not so much banishing as cord-cutting. Seems everytime I sever a situation that has become less than healthy for me, something else happens that draws me back in....think Syl doing the Godfather impersonation...."Just when I thought I was out..." LOL! At any rate, I know I run deep, and can hold a grudge until I die, but it's really tied up very closely with ethics and morals about loyalty and betrayal, etc. that were instilled in me through family from birth. I might only have a few really close friends or a small family, but I would do anything neccessary to help them - and I mean anything, but if they betray me, it's over. Yet getting tied up within this physical realm of drama is not good for the spirit.

So last moon, some friends and I did a revelatory ritual. It was quite intense, and focused sympathetic magick into an onion. Without divulging circle secrets, we basically peeled away each layer to reveal what was beneath.  It wasn't banishing, but revealing. Perhaps these inner layers held demons that needed to be exercised before being exorcised; perhaps these inner layers were positive aspects of ourselve or our pasts that had been covered over and forgotten, and needed fresh air.

The commonality, when we reached the heart of the onion, was self-love. It's hard. But the lack of self-love leads to guilt, low self-esteem, denial, searching without for what's within, rejection, jealousy, fear of loss, and these issues of loyalties and betrayals. So I've been trying to focus on positive, reinforcing memories that connect with the onion layers, to plant with the heart, so that they will grow into a full, ripe root that absorbs negativity, banishes the oogies, protects and defends, and burns fat (LOL), and I will take that into myself.